my blog? wait! what is that? i seem to have abandoned this little page for quite some time. but hey, i have a garden now...i have no time for computer. don't worry though i was patiently reminded to update so here goes.
yes, we are staying for another year. we had pretty much decided this when i received my kawamoto job a year ago since in japan staying somewhere for just one year is not nearly enough time to make meaningful relationships or invest in your work. so...yeah. not such big or surprising news but there you go.
we just got back from the US for Kate's wedding. beautiful, amazing, wonderful...coming back this time was difficult in part because there are no plans yet of when we will see everyone again. that made me incredibly depressed. we had been planning/anticipating the wedding for so long and then it was over...post-wedding depression...who knew it happened to brides-matrons (the word matron alone is enough to depress me).
plus we came back to an incredibly mouldy, stinking house...that made it SO much worse. don't leave your house curtained and shut up for ten days in the peak of the gloomy, rainy season. no air flow, dark rooms, damp damp air, bad idea...GROSS!!! but i learn every day more and more about the resiliency of mould. who knew it could grow on your toilet paper dispenser, the wood floors of your kitchen pantry, your nabe pot, your pleather couch...GROSS!!! so the house was doused and coated in vinegar and we are keeping all the doors open, all the time and slowly the stench is leaving. the towels though are another story. we dream of the day we will have a dryer again, if only for the towels.
but japan don't fret. i still love you. you warmed my heart upon my return when i was gathering the mail off our wet concrete entryway. i found a lovely postcard from canada (thank you for the smile!) covered in a beautifully sealed plastic sleeve. enclosed was a note from the Japanese postal service- We are so sorry. Due to the rainy season, your postcard was becoming damp and damaged. We have enclosed it in plastic to protect it. Sorry for the inconvenience.
impressions from the US-
-people are WAY too big
-food portions are WAY WAY WAY too big
-why are people so unhappy??? they live in the richest, most privileged nation on Earth?!?!
-is it really that hard to smile, and say Thank You?
-spicy food is good
-american sushi is expensive and full of way too much flavor(who knew?)
-i miss half pint japanese drinks (for when you are just a little thirsty!)
-wow, american beer and alcohol is good
-movies are CHEEEEAAAAP!
-can i get some tea please? no sugar added? NO!
-why does everything have so much sugar?
-is it really that hard to smile....really??? why waste your time frowning?
-this supermarket is overwhelming- how do i choose among 30 shampoos. i just want to wash my hair!
-my family and friends are much too far away...i should think about coming home...
the hardest part about coming 'home' to the US though is the confusion. in life i strive to be content with my situation. to be happy wherever i may be, whatever i might be doing, whatever i might possess at that particular moment. i want to see each moment for what it is, for what it brings to me, for what it has to teach me...i achieve this in japan, everyday. i am content in life. i have everything i need. then i travel to the US. my family and friends are there. i am reminded of so many tastes, smells, feelings that i had forgotten existed. and i am left confused. in thinking about where to live for extended period of time, either place is great. but how do i choose? and when i catch myself, upon departure time, thinking- gosh i wish i could stay longer. gee i wish i could have one more family dinner, see one more movie, eat one more helping of fresh chips and salsa- i am so frustrated because i am not content with returning to my japan life despite the fact that i am content there. because, at the moment, i am content here, in the US. but i am not content moving between the two and/or remembering only the good bits of either and longing for them. i am incredibly blessed to have the option of two wonderful, fulfilling lives. but it doesn't make it easy moving between them or ultimately, choosing between them...
schools out for summer!!! good times. today the sun has come out, bright and strong for the first time in weeks (take that mould!). bring it heat, bring it. the outdoor pool opens today. i am starting my correspondence course (nursing pre-reqs). we pick up the new ALT, Blake, from the airport next weds at noon. the first of many summer festivals is this saturday. and our 9 feet tall sunflowers are about to bloom. i think this is our first summer in japan with no big plans (no wedding, no moving, no trip abroad). i am really looking forward to it. random pictures coming soon (when i am not at the BOE).
much love. thanks for hanging in there, faithful readers.
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1 comment:
You sound very conflicted. I know what you mean by feeling content. I miss my stress-free Japanese life. I don't know what to tell you. But I do wish you would come home so that I could visit you. If I win the lottery I will visit you in Kawamoto.
How are the new Jets??
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